PotC Ficlets
by MaleaBotor
Summary: A vicious attack on Mary-Sues.
1. Beautiful Stranger

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Beautiful Stranger

A person walked on the beaches of Port Royal. They were wearing a sky blue dress with icy silver trimming and a bodice with some lace poking out the top. The dress' skirt puffed out in a full bell at the bottom and the inner petticoats were a pure, navy blue. They were wearing dainty, high-heeled shoes that were icy silver to match the trim on their dress. They had skillfully applied make-up to their faces, lining their lips with a dark red colour and applying blush high on their cheekbones. Their coal black, intelligent eyes, lined with kohl, glinted in the sun reflecting off the water. Their dark tresses, twined into braids and dreadlocks looked much like Captain Jack Sparrow's.

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This was not surprising as it WAS Captain Jack Sparrow, dressed up in ladies finery.

"Bloody bets," he muttered darkly, "Ye won't catch me playin' cards with Will again."

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Hey, as you might have guessed, this collection of stories will be making fun of bad role-players. It's what I imagine the role-playing world would be like if people still came up with ridiculously perfect Mary-Sue role-players but Jack stayed the same.

Personally, I'm having fun.


	2. The Battle

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The Battle

Jack Sparrow and his three female crewmates ran to his ship, closely followed by redcoats. One of the girls, who had raven curls cursed and fell, rolling. She moaned in pain.

"You all right?" said Jack, slowing down. She gasped and managed to speak.

"No…I…I'm fine." Jack looked at her incredulously.

"A bullet just went right through your leg!" She hoisted herself to her feet.

"I know, but… I'll manage." Jack shrugged.  
"Fine with me." He dodged a bullet and continued to run. Bullets hit each of the others; one went into the mischievous brunette's back, one went through the red-haired fighter's arm and yet another went into her thigh, and a second bullet went into the other leg of the girl with black locks. All three collapsed, groaning. Jack stopped again.

"We'll manage!" they chorused. Jack frowned.

"Look, are ye sure ye don't want me to…"

"No," the brunette gasped, "leave us behind. Save yourself."

"Fine, I will," said Jack, running the final two metres to The Black Pearl, dashing up the gangplank, and setting sail.

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FIN

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Just thought I'd mention that I'm not continuing any stories. I'm just posting little insights into Jack's life if he was plagued by Mary-Sues. Which he is. So I'll tell you that there's a good number of chapters yet to come, but no continuations.

Unless I feel like it.

Oh, and FIN means 'The End'. Just so you get it.

I mention this because in the reviews of one of my friends, it says something to the extent of 'wats FIN? Plz continue!!'. I can read this a million times and still find it funny.


	3. True Luv

**True Luv**

A slender girl with sea-green eyes and long, flowing black locks tied back with a bandanna was walking on the beaches of Port Royal when she saw Jack walking near her. She called out to him, adjusting the men's clothes she often wore for the freedom, because of her work on Jack's ship. She was wearing black, full breeches and a white shirt with a red vest. Jack turned at her voice and rushed up to her.

"Hello, luv." Her heart melted, as it did every time he called her 'luv'. He looked into her eyes.

"I've… something to tell you."

"What is it, Jack," she said softly.

"Something," he said solemnly, "of utmost importance to our future relationship."

"Yes, Jack?" she said, moving closer to him, looking up into his deep black eyes.

"I… I… I love…"

"Yes, Jack?"

"I love other men." She turned away and looked out to the sea, sadly. Jack nodded.

"I knew ye'd understand."

"Yes," she tried to say normally, but it came out as a sob. She ran away, crying.

Jack watched her leave, and grinned.

"I've got to try that on more of those Mary-Sue things."

_All right. I've figured out why Jack doesn't like Mary-Sues. it's because they all want **commitment.**_

_Which is contrary to Jack's nature._


End file.
